comedy genius
Yes, I have returned. Like a conquering hero. Or a migrating bird. One of those. You choose.
The holidays were a blur of turkey, beer, peanut butter balls, cabbage, chocolate, and two very happy white dogs that I am really quite allergic to. But most of all, the holidays were My Days of Servitude to the Golden Child.
The Golden Child is my nephew. He is just over 18 months old and is a bundle of laughs. And he seems to have decided that I’m the coolest guy in the room. If he was awake and in the same building as me — and not eating or having his poo cleaned off his bottom (and just try to tell me that that’s not a sweet deal) — the odds were very good that he had recently grabbed my hand to go and play with him.
His words are still small in number, but the ones he does know he uses until they wear out. “Wow”. “Uh-Oh”. “Duck”. But his favourite word is “ball” and because he knows how to say it so very well, he has decided to make any and all spherical objects his very favourite objects. All of them. Rubber balls. Soccer balls. Basketballs. Christmas bulbs. Oranges. Globes. Once, I spent 45 minutes walking behind him in a circle through the living room, dining room, kitchen, and hallway, over and over, each of us shaking little round jingle bells. 45 minutes. In a circle. Jingling. Good times.
However, I have discovered one game that makes him laugh so hard I’m worried he’ll get sick. It started with the “Lie Him On The Bed and Drop Pillows On Him Game”. That’s a good one. He especially liked getting to pick out which pillows I would drop on him.(Milton Bradley is currently looking into the rights on that game.)
But we skyrocketed to a whole new level with the evolution of that game into the “Jason Hits Himself In The Head With A Pillow Game”. Oh. My. God. I should get a three-picture-deal with Disney just for making him laugh that hard. Honestly. Adding various “boing-oing!” noises and stumbling around dizzily afterwards only made him laugh harder. He’s making me think I’m some sort of comedy genius. At least with the valuable 12-24 month old set.
It’s nice to know that 3 years of theatre training hasn’t gone completely to waste.
Now… how do I add this to my resume?
January 5th, 2006 at 2:14 pm
Welcome back! Ah yes - three years of theatre training. Sadly I did four, and I have yet to develop my technique with any age group. I think you are doing very well.
Of late I have been spending time with the Swiss nephew who speaks not a word of English, the best I can come up with is throwing the little tyke over my shoulder and holding him upside down until he is almost sick. Then I put him down and he yells “noch einmal!” which is the only verbal communication we have. By the way, that means “again.” I can’t wait until he really is sick. Won’t I be popular!
January 5th, 2006 at 4:15 pm
You may also consider switching things up in the ‘dropping’ department. Those little stuffed animals with the beans in them (as most have, these days, to the chagrin of daycares who are fearful of choking hazards and i’d better stop before this parenthetical statement is longer than the rest of the post) also work like freakin’ charms.
Also, there’s one set of balls you neglected to point out to him (which I assure you I’m not neglecting to point out to my own kid). C’mon, be the “bad uncle”!
January 5th, 2006 at 4:24 pm
S: The upside down carry is awesome! Extra enjoyment comes from watching all observing adults cringe in anticipation of the toddler-dropping they assume will occur. Bah. Wimps.
K: Don’t worry. We’re not neglecting those balls. Especially when he stands up in my lap and starts to jump. Urk.