archive for July 2006

quick useless factoid just to let you know i’m still alive

mmmm... tasty!

Ice cream cake tastes good. Eat some.

That is all.

(What more do you need to know?)

orangutans are pansies

orangutans are pansies

No. I have not returned from my self-imposed, “OH CRAP! I’M GONNA COLLAPSE UNDER THE WEIGHT OF ALL THE FREAKING CRAP I HAVE TO DO! NURSE! I NEED DELICIOUS LIFE-SUSTAINING COOKIES! STAT!” sabbatical.

Posting this picture was a condition of getting my little sister (the villainous blackmailing poo-eating desperado that she is) to feed the Large One and the Small One while we are away for a week in August.

Thus has my obligation has been met.

Now, please allow me to return to my panic and flop-sweat.

quote of the day

“Yesssssss!! Hey! You guys! Mom got Arby’s!!”

-Married to the Sea

Thank you, Sweetney, for adding just a little more oblique babble to my day. You get a cookie.

(Yeah yeah yeah. I’m slack lately. I’m busy. It’s what happens when the rest of the world has a remarkable lack of sympathy with how far behind you are with your blog. Stupid world. No cookie for you.)

most complicated thought in my head today

You know, if I was a Hollywood producer, and I wanted to make a kick-ass Depression-era heartwarmer, I’d have Jim Braddock RIDING Seasbiscuit.

And they’d fight crime.

And Nazis.

Oh YEAH. That would RULE.

I kid you not.

Thankfully, I was in charge of no heavy machinery today.

things i learned during my trip to montreal

dan laying out at MJT 2006

Whew. After much driving, much playing of Ultimate, much walking around Montreal looking for what seemed for the longest time to be a mythical Vietnamese restaurant, much Gatorade, much sunshine, MUCH wind, much more driving, and much too much fun, My Lovely Wife and I have returned from Montreal.

No time to get into the full-on rundown of the weekend, but let’s just say that we did not get our asses handed to us. We actually came out of the weekend with a winning record (4 wins vs. 3 losses) and improved our ranking from 20th (out of 21) to end the weekend tied for 11th place. Woo-hoo! Go team! Halifax Masters rocked the house! Final scores for Halifax Masters (i.e., “Scotch”):

Saturday

Pool Play:

  • Scotch 7, Sherbrooke 10
  • Scotch 11, Montreal Grand Masters 3
  • Scotch 7, Teenage Cavemen 11
  • Scotch 11, SMUT 6

Cross-Over:

  • Scotch 12, Opus 10

Sunday

Consolation Quarter-Finals:

  • Scotch 13, Not So Old SAG 9

Consolation Semi-Finals:

  • Scotch 7, Big Science 15

Final Ranking: Tied for 11th

To tide you over until I can present you with the complete saga, allow me to present you with a few crucial tidbits of knowledge that I gleaned over the past four days:

  • My Lovely Wife drives faster on the highway than I do. Much faster. Frighteningly faster.
  • Contrary to what I (wrongly) assumed for years, the Open division is just as spirited as co-ed Ultimate.
  • It’s really easy to get angry at fast-food servers. It’s just as easy to apologise to fast-food servers. Guess what? The apology is more appreciated.
  • Broken noses bleed a lot.
  • Mark Beasy can suck beer out of a disc face-first while imitating a bird very quickly.

And the final, hard-won piece of info that I gathered that I must shout from the rooftops to prevent further horrors…

  • Don’t ever, ever microwave hard-boiled eggs. Just… don’t.