who do we blame?

shakeshakeshake shakeshakeshale shake your booty shake your booty In Ancient Thrace, before Poseidon vanished from the seas and Apollo from the sky, a hero was born.

One night, when the full moon shone upon the olive leaves, Zeus, father of the gods, came to the woman Joananchachia in the form of an Olympian discus and struck her upon the brow.

She declared, “FUCK! That hurt!”

Thus was his seed implanted within her.

Nine moons later, the Thracian hero, Jason, sprang from her loins fully-formed, lightning flashing in his eyes.

Again, she declared, “FUCK! That hurt!”

(It started to be a thing with her.)

And so began the Age of Heroes.

(There. Let’s see how long until someone calls me on that one.)