The remnants of Hurricane/Tropical Storm/Really Pissy Mood Noel are sweeping through town right now.

Me and the Large One are on blackout watch. In the event that we lose power, my duties consist of leaping into action to get our generator running to keep the sump pump running or else we are going to employ a whole lot more dog-paddling than is proper when doing laundry tomorrow.

The Large One’s duties consist of keeping me warm.

I do have to say, I don’t know if this is what most people have in mind when they use the phrase “a state of cat-like readiness”:

Crap! Almost missed my deadline.

Well! Thank goodness I made it here in time!

You might have missed…

Ummm…

Errr…

… uses of prosthetics in reptile thievery?

…

Quality material here, folks.

Quality.

• Metro.co.uk: “It’s dove at first sight” (via Cute Overload)

Read the story.

Then be certain to mop up the remnants of your heart from the floor. It could leave a stain.

[From Wikipedia's "List of animal names"]

• Ass
• Beaver
• Crab
• Dingo
• Limpet
• Mole
• Peafowl
• Portuguese Man ‘o’ War
• Smelt
• Swallow
• Woodcock
• Yak

I am merely a conduit of knowledge.

…

And please remember… this could have been much worse.

I’ve felt pretty free tossing the old asshat back and forth across the Canada/U.S. border lately.

However, I do believe we Canadians just earned the kick-asshat.

• CBC News: “Mounties get their… can”

In Manitoba, a couple of Mounties were called in to help an animal in distress. Seems a deer got a coffee can stuck on its face and was running head-first into the local shrubbery.

Do the Mounties tranquilize the deer and calmly remove the coffee can?

Oh, honey… no.

Instead… one of the Mounties WRESTLED THE DEER TO THE GROUND.

Once the deer was pinned, they removed the coffee can, and then let the deer go.

Now… the deer is their bitch.

…

I think my testosterone just spiked. Urgh. Ow.

Well. I think we all know what this calls for…

(Wait for it…)

CHIPMUNK EATING A PEANUT!

What? You were expecting a deer? Pff. Amateur.