“Who am I kidding. They should give awards for this. Man, if you can make your kids laugh so hard they pee when they’re TWELVE you’re practically a Jedi.”

- Death By Children

“Update: he’s now tucking small woodland animals into the fly of my pajamas and I never thought I would ever type that sentence.”

- Mike

Still suh-wamped. Still ignoring you all. Still nursing a small acid-extruding ball of guilt in my belly at ignoring you all.

But you wanna know what makes me feel better?

Well, at this very minute, this does:

Honestly. Are you so hard-hearted, so stony-souled, so psychically-constipated, that the sight of a small feline recoiling dramatically from explosives does not move you?

Shame on you.