Lesson learned: If you are in the World’s Largest Covered Bird Park, expect poop.

Lesson learned: Monorails do exist outside of Ogdenville, North Haverbrook, and Brockway.

And yes — it really does glide as softly as a cloud.

…

What do you mean I’ve missed two days of Malaysia Lessons?

Bah. I scorn you and your Western liberal ideas of “counting”.

Lesson learned: Never ever stay at the Concorde Inn KLIA.

That is, unless you have predilection for ants, a distinct lack of hot water, and truly atrocious customer service.

I don’t know. That may be your thing.

Lesson learned: If you are the groom-to-be, and you are at your bachelor party, and one of your groomsmen says, “We are going to get you sooOOooOOoo drunk!”, the proper response is not:

“Can’t be done — I’m INVINCIBLE.”

You are not.

And it will be proven to you.

In tequila.

By the bye, if you are looking for photographic evidence that I actually did go to Malaysia and not just hole up in my house re-watching the first two seasons of BSG (for the uninitiated, that is the dread and wonderful Battlestar Galactica)*, then have at it:

• Flickr Photostream: Malaysia Trip

* For the record, I re-watched the first two seasons of Battlestar Galactica AFTER I returned from Malaysia.

So don’t fret that I have been insufficiently entertained.